


Remember When

by Disloyal_Order_Of_Water_Buffaloes



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Fake AH Crew, M/M, also gavin has anxiety in this okay, dont read if u dont like death lmao, trans!Jack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-07
Updated: 2015-09-07
Packaged: 2018-04-19 15:24:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4751339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Disloyal_Order_Of_Water_Buffaloes/pseuds/Disloyal_Order_Of_Water_Buffaloes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gavin writes a letter to Michael, telling him what he's done for Gavin and how he was in a relationship with Gavin even through his annoying anxiety.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Remember When

**Author's Note:**

> I like writing oneshots more than updating stories i guess oops. but also anxiety!gavin and fahc because yeah

_Remember the day you tried teaching me how to drive in your car and I dented it? I thought you'd kill me._

"Just slow around the curve, don't go too fast," Michael coaxed, knowing driving made Gavin panic pretty easily.

It started good. But then his oto slipped and he pressed the gas pedal a little too hard and ended up hitting a nearby telephone pole. With a shriek, he lept out of the car and put his head in his hands.

"Michael! Oh, _god_ , I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry, I fucked up your car, oh my god. That was expensive, too, I'm--"

"Gav," Michael grabbed his trembling shoulders. "It's fine, really. It's just a dent. I've done way worse to my own cars and I've had a license for however many years. It's not a big deal, really." Gavin nodded, his eyes still showing panic. "You did pretty good, though. You were able to back into a parking spot nearly. Most assholes around here don't know how to do that," he slung an arm around his boyfriend and led them back to the car.

_But you didn't._

* * *

_Remember when I vomited all over the floor when we were alone in the penthouse? I thought you'd scream at me._

"Michael, I'm gonna--" Gavin grabbed his boyfriend's arm and knocking his own controller and various snacks off of his lap. He couldn't get the warning out before his various-colored and partly undigested unhealthy and sweet food came back up his throat and directly onto the carpet.

"Oh, fuck," Michael stood and helped Gavin over the puke, leading him to the bathroom with some of his own clothes for Gavin to wear since he'd gotten puke all over his own.

"God, I'm sorry, Michael," he'd look up at the older when he stopped for a minute. "I ruined that carpet, I'm so sorry. What's Geoff gonna think? It was an accident, really, I didn't know I was getting sick."

"Gav, Gav," Michael knelt by him and wiped some sweat off the Lad's forehead. "It'll be fine. Geoff won't care, as long as you're being taken care of. You may not be in the crew, but he still cares about you over some stupid carpet he can get cleaned some day, okay?" Gavin nodded and sighed to himself. "Besides, the guy fuckin' bathes in cash. He could go but a whole new thing of carpet if he wanted to."

_But you didn't._

* * *

_ Remember the day I dragged you to a park and it rained like you said it would? I thought you’d say “I told you so.” _

“Mi- _cool_ ,” Gavin whined and laid across the other’s lap on the couch. “Please? It’ll be fun! There’s one just outside of town that’s nice, really.”

“Gav, it’s gonna rain. Look at the clouds.”

“It’ll pass by the time we get there, though! It won’t even be that bad. Besides, there’s pavilions and stuff we can wait under. Please?”

“Fine,” Michael smiled as his boyfriend leapt up to get his shoes. “I swear, you’re a child sometimes. You’re gonna make me play on the playground equipment with you, aren’t you?”

Gavin just gave him a sheepish look and dragged him out of the apartment building.

 

Gavin yelled and jumped off the slide sprinting under the playground equipment to shield himself from the rain. “You idiot!” Michael called, soon following suit and joining him. “Why wouldn’t you just go to the pavilion?”

“I’m not running all the way over there! I’m not bloody _stupid_!”

Michael shook his head with a grin and sat in the sand with gavin’s head buried in his neck due to the loud cracks of thunder. “It’s okay,” he’d reassure every now and then, “you’re okay.”

_But you didn’t._

* * *

_ Remember the time we got mad at each other and I didn’t talk to you for a couple days? I thought you’d leave me. _

“It’s not _my_ fucking fault you refused to join the crew because of your goddamn anxiety!” Michael spat at Gavin, both absolutely fuming and refusing to see the other’s side. “It’s no one’s fault but yours that you let that stop you from doing shit. Would you even be _able_ to shoot a gun?”

“It’s not my fault, okay?” Gavin yelled at him. “Maybe you should spend more time helping me rather than drinking with them or saying you’re planning shit but you’re just playing video games. If you’d rather spend time with them, go ahead! Just get your stuff and leave, then. I don’t care.”

“Fucking fine. I’m going to the penthouse tonight. If you don’t care so much, put all of it in a trash bag and burn it. I don’t fucking care.”

With that, the front door slammed and he was gone. The apartment was silent. He slept on the couch with several alcoholic drinks in his system to numb his emotions.

 

“Gav. Gav, wake up. Jesus, when was the last time you showered?”

Gavin woke to someone shaking him, laying on the couch. He hadn’t done much since Michael left quite honestly he was too busy beating himself up for ruining the relationship. “Michael?” Gavin rubbed his eyes.

“Yeah, who else has a key to your apartment? C’mon you gotta get up. I got you some water, too.”

Once Gavin had been up long enough to actually register what Michael was saying they were both on the couch next to each other. “I’m sorry. I was being an asshole, I shouldn’t have said shit about anxiety. Yeah, I was spending more time with the gang, I didn’t realize we weren’t getting much time together. Wanna have a movie night or something, later?”

_But you didn’t._

* * *

_ Remember when I didn’t think I’d be a good parent? I thought you’d abandon me. _

“Something wrong, Gav? You seem kinda off,” Michael noted one morning in the house they’d bought just outside the city since they were in the process of adopting a kid. Los Santos wasn’t really a good place to raise a child, honestly.

“I’m not going to be a good father,” he blurted out, wringing his hands together nervously.

“Where the hell’d you get that idea? Besides, we pick her up in about a week, I don’t think you can just back out, really.”

“I dunno, it’s just been worrying me. It’s not like I can help it.”

“Is that why you’ve been so jumpy lately and haven’t been getting much sleep?”

Gavin just shrugged. “Listen up,” Michael sat him at the kitchen table. “You’re honestly gonna be amazing. Like, now our kid won’t only have a criminal to look up to, and she’ll have someone who understands anxiety and fear. You’re an amazing guy in general, I’m lucky you even want to raise a kid with me. And yeah we’ll fuck up here or there, but I guarantee you’ll be the best dad she could ask for,” Michael took Gavin’s hand.

_But you didn’t._

* * *

_ I wanted to ask you something important when you got back from your heist, even though I wasn’t sure what you’d say (despite us being together for however many years). _

Gavin knew how the heists worked. Michael would have to leave in the morning (around the time their seven-year-old daughter got dropped off at school because, yes, Gavin had gotten his license), the heist usually took place in the evening, and they’d stay at the safe house for a couple days just to be safe. It hadn’t been a problem before, only injuries that they could recover from. Once Michael had burned himself pretty bad and some people got shot here or there, but it wasn’t too bad.

There had been many heists since they’d adopted their daughter, Phoebe, three years ago. Gavin had just told her that Michael had to go do something for work for a couple days and he’d come back. They hadn’t told her about what he actually did, because she was seven-years-old and could get Michael in some trouble if she was to go tell her friends.

Gavin kept the news on while Phoebe and her friend played in front of the couch. he enjoyed listening to them and seeing how much they enjoyed board games and dolls and toy trucks and whatever else they had. The TV was kept at a low volume, just so the kids couldn’t hear anything bad.

He’d been able to hear it listening carefully. _“There were reports of five people: four men and one woman fleeing the scene quickly. The bank was set on fire by something unknown after a teller hit their panic button and the LSPD arrived.”_

After sighing a little in relief and twirling the ring he held on his finger, Gavin went back to making the kids something to eat. After they sat down and played with their food Gavin went to pace his and Michael’s bedroom due to the anxiety eating away at him over asking Michael to marry him when he got home. It was only when Phoebe and Taylor had come to ask for him to take them to get ice cream that he switched his focus to something else.

A couple days went by, Phoebe asked where Dad was. Gavin said working. A few more days later, she asked again and he said the same thing. He knew what probably happened but could barely believe it unless one of the guys or Jack told him.

A day after that the doorbell rang and Phoebe was the first to the door (Michael only took the keys he needed with him, just in case they got lost and someone found them or something) whipping it open. “Dad!” she cried trying to search through the four people at their door. “Where’s my dad…?”

“Where's your other dad?” Jack knelt down to her height and asked kindly.

“Hey, guys, what’s up?” Gavin came to the door and picked up his daughter, acting like he wasn’t suspicious anything had happened.

“Hey, Phoebe,” Ray moved towards the front of the group, “wanna go get some ice cream or something with me and Uncle Ryan?”

“Sure!” she cried and leapt from her dad’s arms to follow them to Ryan’s car.

“Uh, come on in guys,” Gavin stepped out of the doorway for Geoff and Jack to come in. He didn’t dare ask if it had happened, he couldn’t send himself into a panic attack or something if it wasn’t true.

They all took seats in the living room, Gavin facing the older two. “Uhm, so,” Jack started with a sad smile. “Michael’s… he’s, uh, gone. I’m really sorry," she kept her composure (because Gavin surely would be in worse condition than them) and wiped her eyes, seeing Geoff did the same.

“We were at the safe house and there was a sniper or something around, I guess. We just know he got shot and, uh, yeah,” Geoff shrugged. “Sorry we had to tell you.”

“I-I don’t,” Gavin shook his head and gulped. “I--he _can’t_ , right? He can’t be, are you sure?”

“Gav, it was in his head, I’m sorry.”

“ _Fuck_ ,” he hissed and put his head in his hands. “How am I--shit, how am I going to tell Phoebe? We never really told her what he did.”

“We can do it, if you’d like,” Jack offered in a soft voice. “I’m sure we could figure something out.”

The next thing he knew, the room was spinning and he couldn’t breathe. He was sweating and the two were on either side of his, wondering if Geoff explaining it was a wrong thing to do.

Minutes later they were reassuring him that everyone was a mess and they’d be there for him. They could even put on a funeral, maybe, but it was okay for him to sit there and sob and let the two take care of him for a little bit.

That night Phoebe asked to sleep in their bed with him, due to being pretty broken up. Once she drifted into sleep, Gavin put the ring left in his nightstand drawer on Michael’s nightstand. He’d never get to ask Michael and receive an answer.

_ But you never did. _


End file.
